mothering: becoming an expert of sorts

It would stand to reason that if you worked at something for 30 years, you’d eventually become an expert at that thing, that you would hone your skills to the point where you could do that thing with your eyes closed, it would be so natural to you.

I’ve been working at being a mother for 30 years now, and I’m still not an expert at it. Not even close. I made mistakes from the beginning and I’m still making them now. It’s part of the parenting process, I suppose. I don’t think any gets it right all the time. But as long as we get it right more than we get it wrong, as long as we own up to our mistakes and do our best to rectify them, we’re getting it right.

There are a lot of people out there who will tell you they are experts at mothering. They write books and articles telling you how to best perform your parental duties. I don’t know who anointed them experts, but I’m here to tell you they’re not. Because nobody becomes an expert at parenting. You become an expert at small, individual things that make up parenting. But you don’t become an expert on a whole, because parenting is a never ending learning experience.

I became an expert at so many of those little things. I perfected my skills at navigating the special education system. I became adept at advocating for my child. I am an expert at detecting ear infections, getting…