no control

My therapist is really fond of trying to get me to not worry about things I can’t control. I laugh sometimes because the entire foundation of my anxiety disorder rests on me worrying about things I can’t control. Death, the weather, car accidents — things that are out of my hands is my specialty.

So we talked this week about my anxiety surrounding the election and she trotted out the usual “it’s out of your control” lecture and I stopped her. This isn’t something I can talk myself down from, I told her. This isn’t me worrying about a hurricane that’s not even going to hit us, or getting into an accident on…